As the good ol’ involved (sounds like some rap line, hola) piece of shit I am, I wanna join in to the discussion that’s been circulating the gaming news sites for a few days now, involving the required length of the game for it to be considered “dollars well spent”. Unlike most of these discussions, I won’t give you any insight into some actual … you know, arguments and shit, but rather just write the first thing that comes to my mind about the given subject, without any remorse or regret. So … yeah.
Anyway, this bit kind of surprised me actually. I was under the impression that the newer generation of gamers (basically mobile-platform gamers with side-dish of PC/Consoles) didn’t particularly liked lengthy games. That, of course, isn’t the case; it’s rather my delusion of the past because, one part of it is that the oldies were often really hard games to beat whereas the new titles are like a stroll through the rainbow bridge. So that’s when my confusion stopped. Well, not really. If you remember “Kane and Lynch” bullshit from a couple of years ago (the game was pretty much single player, 2 ½ hours long gameplay, priced at 60$), the dust was really fucking widespread. It felt as if the virus had occupied the internet because everyone was pretty much bashing this shitty tactic from the devs. Then “day one DLC weapon back, big boobs, ass glitter” bullshit appeared and everybody eventually forgot about it. It’s rather strange, at least for me, who has been gaming since the ’99, that we keep going back to the same old topics that we’ve already covered in great detail just a few years ago. The question is: why?
Regarding the length of the game, I’m one of those who doesn’t give a fuck. When I spend my not-so-earned bucks on a game, I’m fully aware that there’s 99% chance that I’ll feel like shit for spending 60$ on a game. In an analogy that somebody already mentioned, probably, we can compare this to the length of the book: is it a standard to wish that a book has 600 pages if you’re paying 20$ for it or something? Should it be? Does it fucking matter? If 4 hours are enough for the story to be fully fleshed out and felt the way it was meant to be felt, why stretch the fuck out of it without any reason? Now, if the game is bad, that’s a whole another matter. It’s not the length’s fault. Its developers fault for not being able to mold a decent gaming experience within the package. As a consumer, and not just of games but in general, I think that anyone past the age of fourteen should be self-aware when buying something and understand that there’s a high chance that he won’t feel as if his money was well spent. I remember back when ‘Eragon’ first came out and reviewers were describing it as “modern-age remake of Lord of the Rings”, I jumped that fucking shark so hard that I denied my body a poop for six hours just so I can start reading it while I’m taking a crap. And fuck, I was fucking disappointed but, even back then, I knew that it’s no one’s fault but mine. I read a book and I moved the fuck on.
General public should understand that games aren’t necessity but luxury – meaning that, if you’ve got extra 60, 100, or 100000 fucking dollars to spend on it, you do it. If you don’t, don’t fucking do it. And, if you do, don’t fucking rave about how the game is terrible on the internet. And yes, I’m a fucking hypocrite, deal with it.
To elaborate, or rather clean the shit up before someone thinks “WELL DAH DUDE, WHA ABOUT WHEN GAME BAD; YOU GOTTA SPREAD WORD AND SHIT” – yes, that IS correct. What I’m saying is that you shouldn’t bitch about how “the game wasn’t worth the money you paid”. As a developed teen/adult/fucking grandpa or whatever, you should be fully aware that there’s a high chance you wasted that money. THAT’S HOW THE FUCKING CONSUMPTION WORKS. That’s how you realize your taste. It’d be the same as if you go to a new restaurant, order a new meal you’ve never tasted before in your life, and then bitch to the management about how it wasn’t money well spent. It’s exactly the same fucking thing.
Honestly, I haven’t played the game everyone’s been bitching about so I can’t give you any light on that topic. What I can do is tell you that THIS has been discussed to any and every fucking detail long ago and that everybody has their own opinion that might clash with yours. Just as the idea of sexualized women in gaming keeps resurfacing like unpaid fucking bills, so will every topic in gaming, eventually. ‘Goof games’ vs ‘serious games’. PC vs consoles. All that shit. Is it good that it’s happening? Yeah, but we gotta stop when we reach a point of “oh, look, an article about new robot that can suck dicks. I better complain how Dragon Age’s sidequests were empty and hollow. That’ll prove … something.”
The point of this entire article is pretty much this: it’ll blow over in less than a month, when a new game comes out that fucks something else up. We keep recycling the same old questions, no, they’re not even fucking problems but questions, since the days gamers somehow began feeling entitled. You’re not. You, as a single person, don’t really matter in the gaming world. For every game you hate, there are fifty people out there that love it. For every aspect of the game you hate(length, story, lack of tits etc.) there are fifty others that love it. You just need to grow the fuck up and deal with it.
So, yeah, as I mentioned, this hasn’t been about “should length of the game determined its price point” as much as it’s been about the mentality of the gamers. Thanks for reading and I hope you were offended by this article. If you were, seriously, grow the fuck up.